Law of Attraction Awareness - Progress

I've had a couple of my books out since February under my pen name but nothing has really happened with them. I've sold a few, but I knew I needed more exposure. So I set an intention and asked. Yes, I believe
intentions can be statements or questions. I asked - What do I need to do next in order to let people know my stories are out? Send me information.

Soon after asking that I got an email from an indie publishing mailing list I'm on, asking for subscribers to ask any question they have regarding writing, indie publishing and marketing. So I asked - with a limited amount of time to write & promote, what would be the best use of my time?

Her answer was reviews. I needed to get some reviews on blogs, on Amazon, on Barnes and Noble.

Okay, but I didn't know how to do that. No one that had bought the books had left a review.

But that day - yes, that day - as I was going through my Twitter feed I noticed all these retweets from fellow authors. They included various blogs where they or friends were being reviewed. So I bookmarked the sites as I could, went to them when I was able, and read over the blog and the review policies.

I have multiple blog sites now in favorites, I've requested reviews from seven of them, been accepted for two so far, accepted two guest post spots in August on one, and joined a blog hop for August / September.

I don't know yet how this will affect my sales or if it even will. But it continues to amaze me what happens when all we do is ask.

There is no coincidence.

My $100,000 Check - A Promise to Myself

I don't know if I've written about my $100,000 check before.

When I first read Think and Grow Rich last year, the main point was to have a tangible, set goal for what you wanted to achieve. My goal is to be a successful writer earning $100,000 a year by my 45th birthday. That will be July 16, 2016.

(Yes, I will be 41 on Monday. Happy Birthday to me :) )

I found an image of a blank check online. You can actually find these now on The Secret's website or buy some from TUT as well. But I just used Google Image Search, found a blank check photo and used Paint to edit it.

I made it out to myself, dated it July 16, 2016, and then signed it "Law of Attraction."

Here's a picture:

I carry this with me in my purse. Every now and again when I'm looking for something I'll find it in the side pocket. It reminds me that I'm working toward my dreams and they are coming true.

How are you reminding yourself that your dreams are coming true?

How Real Desires are Determined

I love to read over old posts at Good Vibe Blog. There is so much information there.

I came across this comment on one post and it explained a lot of questions I had about how our desires are determined through Law of Attraction, even though some of our desires seem to compete with each other (like my desire to both travel AND build a house.)

On Good Vibe Blog - From: M Kenneth Petruzzi on April 11, 2011 at 6:16 am (Word Vibes)

I think that the term "You manifest what you think about" or "We get what we pay attention to" works conceptually as well as literally. In other words, since the Universe is brilliantly creative, and each of us always has competing desires going on at any given time, the Universe answers all things in a brilliantly creative way that fits within our consensus reality in a way that considers all our desires and energy diversions at any given time, and serves all.

Kenneth goes on to explain a comment that one coach uses in his teachings. The comment is that if we truly became what we constantly thought about, that he would have become a cheerleader in high school.

Kenneth says that while that person may not actually BECOME a cheerleader, that he would definitely have noticed them more than usual, maybe even dated one.

And that is how our desires are met, even what seem to be conflicting desires.

We don't necessarily want something tangible. We want how we think it will make us feel.

A boy thinking about cheerleaders wants to feel good about himself. He wants the attention of a pretty girl. He may have a belief that dating a cheerleader will make him more popular, so that is what he really wants.

I don't necessarily want to live permanently on the road in an RV. What I want is the freedom to explore that choice, the freedom to come and go. That is what I'm really looking for. Freedom to choose where to go, what to see, the excitement of a new place and new experience. But I also want the choice to stay home where things are familiar and have that experience. Ultimately, it all comes down to having the freedom to make my own decisions about how I spend my time.

(Freedom - I think I'm going to call that my 'soul' word. It is really resonating with me)

What are some conflicting desires you may have? Think about what you may really want instead, what feeling you're after.

And while you're doing that, think back to your past where you thought you wanted something in particular but got something different, but just as satisfying.

Like the song says,

You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you get what you need.

Discover Who You Are

Here is a wonderful excercise to help you discover - and remember - who you are.

Write down five things about yourself. BUT they cannot include anything regarding your work status - your job title, if you're a student, full time parent, etc.

Here are some hints for things to include:

Hobbies
Favorite things
Something unusual about yourself
That dream deep in yourself, the one you don't usually talk about

Here are mine:

I love science fiction movies / TV shows, like Star Trek TNG, Firefly, Doctor Who.
I am the oldest of four and the only girl.
I love pizza, especially spinach Alfredo.
I have lived abroad for a time and visited England for three weeks during college.
I want to have some experience of extended travel, maybe for 3-6 months out of the year and then have a home base to return to.

What is the purpose of this exercise?

To remind us that we are unique and special. We are not our jobs or the amount of money we make, the degree we have, "just" a parent or "just" a spouse or significant other. We were created to love pizza, science fiction, new experiences and cultures.

Honor these things about yourself. Take some time every day and do something that is uniquely you. Honor your authentic self.

My Thankful List From April 2011

The first time I watched The Secret I'd been at my new job less than a month. I was still reeling from a divorce, my son had left for the summer, and I hadn't had a very good week at work. I needed to relax and found The Secret on Netflix.

I was immediately drawn into the stories, drawn into the concepts. It resonated with me so strongly. And when it got to the point where they discussed being thankful for what you already had, that hit me right in the heart and the head. I paused the movie and wrote out this list:

I am thankful for my job.
I am thankful for my car.
I am thankful for the house I rent.
I am thankful for my son and (formerly ex) husband.
I am thankful for a supportive mom.
I am thankful for the luxuries I do have - computer, Internet, smart phone.
I am thankful that I am healthy.
I am thankful for supportive friends.
I am thankful for the church and its members.
I am thankful for my pets.
I am thankful that I have food to eat.
I am thankful that I have clothes to wear.
I am thankful to be alive another day.

What are you thankful for?

Long Term Travel Continued

I had been affirming and praying over this desire for a few days when my husband found the notes I'd written about my ideas. He asked me about them in a calm way. There wasn't any fighting. I let him know that I still had a desire to travel but I was willing to compromise. Now, I didn't tell him that I would do it on my own if he didn't want to come. I figured I would cross that bridge if it came to it. To my surprise, he was willing to listen to my ideas. He was receptive enough that I asked him to go with me to an RV show. I figured we could find a travel trailer to take on short trips, maybe a camper van to use during a longer trip or a summer trip if we wanted. And he agreed.

We had a wonderful time at the show. It was in a larger city but we found the convention area fine with no fighting about directions. When we can go on a trip without fighting over turn lanes and blinkers and which direction to go, then you know we have become completely different people!

He fell in love with the coaches, of course. But we found two fifth wheels we liked as well, and a travel trailer. I told him again that this didn't mean I wanted to full time for the rest of our lives. I just wanted to do some type of long term travel, maybe a summer, that was all. He agreed and said he understood. I just wanted to come clean about my feelings. And even though I would love to full time in an RV, I was fully prepared to compromise for summer travel - either together or alone.

He surprised me today. He forgot his lunch so I took it to him at work. We talked about a lot of things - how he's unhappy in his job, the books I'm writing, my transcription website, the ideas I have. And he told me that since I'd shared with him the concept of life coaching he'd been thinking about it. I'd had two free session with coaches and enjoyed them a lot.

So now we have more ideas on how to earn money and still be free for work and travel. This is ultimate freedom. This is what we want - to work at something we love, earn a living, and live a life in abundance, affluence and creativity.

He's going to start life coaching training in April. I'm going to follow him, possibly in the fall. And we'll have yet another non traditional income source to add to our possibilities.

We're seeing that $100K a year getting closer and closer than we've ever dreamed. And to top it off - he's agreed that we can do it from an RV, traveling while we're still young enough to enjoy it.

Yes, life is good, and I am blessed.

Long Term Travel in the Works

A year ago when my husband and I divorced I had been expressing an idea to travel in an RV or travel trailer, workamping and living all over. It seems that this idea was the last straw for him. Or maybe one of the last straws.

After he left I knew that I had to put that particular idea on hold. It was still something I wanted to do and I was determined to do it on my own. But I still had a teenager at home with me and I had no money. I had to provide for my son and myself. So I manifested my job - complete with a higher hourly rate than I'd asked for, benefits and vacation time. I discovered law of attraction and positive thinking. I began to rebuild my confidence and self-esteem. I apologized to my then ex-husband, realizing that I'd been selfish for many years.

When we decided to get back together I thought I had to let go of my dream of extended travel. Even though we were better off financially together, we were still tied to traditional jobs. He wanted a house, a place for roots. I was just going to let it go, but that dream still stayed in the back of my mind.

I'd recently realized that I still had that dream and and I was under the false assumption that because we'd gotten re-married that I had to completely give it up. But why? I asked myself. Why? I'm a grown up. If I want to travel, I need to find a way to travel. I need to find a compromise.

My compromise was this. I would save enough to buy a used camper van. Then I would save enough for a trip, maybe a long term trip, two or three weeks or even a summer trip. This may take some time, but we could use the camper van locally on weekends. So how would I pay for it? Well, I have a job. I would save money from my job. I would save money from my transcription business. I was writing, submitting short stories to e-publishers. I could save some money from that. And I had my websites - this one and another one about transcription. I could earn money from these sites. And when I got to a certain point, I could share my ideas with hubby and compromise.

Now, how to get the extended time from work in order to do these treks? I decided to start looking for a job in the school system, something with summers off and regular breaks during the year. I thought if he could also get something with the school system, then that could be a perfect compromise. He would have the job security he wants, along with a house to have as a base, and we could travel during the summers.

I wrote out this plan and an affirmation and I prayed over it. I didn't want to be selfish like before. I just wanted my desires to happen too. I didn't want to give up any of my dreams simply because we'd remarried. But I didn't want any of the old arguments to come up either. So I prayed and affirmed that there would be no fighting over this.

Then I realized as well that I didn't necessarily have to compromise with him. I am an adult, and if I wanted to travel during the summers - alone or with a friend - I was perfectly capable. If I had the money, if the bills would be paid, if I had something for safety, then why not? Why compromise? So I decided that I was going to let go. I was going to make my dream come true.

(Continued in next post)

Dreams coming true :)

There have been a few things I've wanted in my life. Since discovering Law of Attraction and positive thinking a year ago - and what a year! - I have come to believe that anything is truly possible.

These are the things I've wanted to do the most:

Publish a novel with Harlequin
Earn $100,000 year with nontraditional income
Long-term travel

I am on my way to publishing. I have my novel half done at 25K words. I will have it finished by the end of the month, then I'll have some beta readers go over it, do some edits, then have it ready for submission by August. I believe firmly that I will be accepted by Harlequin. I also have ideas for several more stories ready to go.

I believe I'm on the way to earning that $100,000 as well. I'm playing with what nontraditional types of income I can have in order to create that amount of annual income and this is what I've come up with:

Writing novels, publishing through traditional means or nontraditional means
Online income through advertising on this blog and my other website.
Life coaching. I have thought about this a lot for the past three months. I've been researching and we've found a training program.
Speaking fees. Once we become life coaches, we'll be able to travel and speak all over the United States.

Long term travel. It's looking like I'll get that wish soon as well in a few years. That will be shared in the next post as I believe I've manifested something I thought I'd had to give up / compromise on.

The point of this post is to continue to believe in yourself and your abilities, believe in your dreams. No matter what anyone says to you, never give up.

To Intend or Not to Intend - Are We Trying Too Hard?

There is so much sometimes to Law of Attraction. Even on this blog I talk about affirmations, prepaving your day, vision boards, positive thinking. But is it too much? How do we know?

We know when it becomes stressful. When you are planning your day and you worry if you'll find time to meditate or visualize your goals, or get upset that you didn't write in your gratitude journal or your pray rain journal or you forgot to prepave while in the shower this morning. If doing any of the processes becomes a chore then it's too much.

A process is just a process. That is all. Abraham Hicks says that the processes they give in Ask and It Is Given are to help us release resistance. That is all. The processes are not magical. They are to help us expect our manifestations. They are to help us stay positive and grateful and happy so that we can welcome the manifestation when it comes. If doing the process becomes a chore, then it adds resistance instead of taking it away.

Are you trying to handle too many processes? Are you always trying something new? Remember that it's not the process that matters. It's the feelings behind the process.

If you feel that you are too stressed out with whatever LoA processes you are doing, then stop. Just stop. Just enjoy your day. If you want to write in your journal, do it. If you want to meditate, then do it. But don't do it because you feel you have to in order to make LoA work. The Law of Attraction works no matter what you do. What is important is how you feel. So pamper yourself today and relax. Your desires are already known. Let yourself relax in expectation of receiving them now.

We live in an abundant world

As manifestors, deliberate creators or just people-who-use-LOA, we believe we live in an abundant world. We already believe that there is enough of everything - money, houses, cars, jobs, clothing, food - anything you can imagine, there is enough. Now economics is starting to back that up.

The definition of traditional economics analyzes the distribution and consumption of goods and services. Economists are also looking at our resources. Traditional economists, though, say that there are only
limited resources. Over the years many of these doomsayer economists have stated we are about to run out of this or that or the other thing. But have we?

No, we haven't. Because every time we believe that we are lacking something we either discover we didn't need it at all or some type of technology is invented to make it better. Either a better process or more efficient way to work.

Abraham Hicks talks about this as well, comparing material wealth or material things to health. They state that we don't think, "Well, I need to be sick for a while so that others can be healthy." Why do we feel that if we are doing well that others must lack? That if we have more than enough then something is being taken from someone else?

I did believe that, but no more. I believe we live in a world where there is more than enough for everyone.

Green Lantern - Law of Attraction in Hollywood

I finally got to see Green Lantern on DVD over Thanksgiving weekend.

The first thing I noticed about the movie was the description of the ring's power. It works through the force of will. Whatever you can imagine, you can create.

Granted, it seemed as if everything that was created disappeared in a wisp of green smoke when it wasn't needed any longer, but Hal did create a necklace for his girlfriend that appeared to become permanent.

What impressed me the most, though, was near the end of the movie when Hal is fighting the monster Paralax.

Parallax is fear. He destroys people who are afraid and lives off their fear energy. He is taunting Hal, telling him that he will lose, telling him that he will destroy Earth and everything on it. Hal is holding him back with a green shield, his eyes shut tight, and as Parallax continues to taunt him he begins to recite the Green Lantern oath:

"In brightest day, in blackest night,
No evil shall escape my sight.
Let those who worship evil's might,
Beware my power, Green Lantern's light!"


This oath was like a mantra or affirmation to Hal. He recited it when fear was right on top of him, telling him that everything was lost, nothing was going to survive, and there was nothing he could do about it.

Repeating this oath reminded Hal of his powers as Green Lantern. Even though he was new to the Corps, he knew what he was capable of -- both as himself, a daredevil test pilot, and as Green Lantern. And it was in reciting that oath and remembering his own power that he was able to rise up and find a way to defeat Parallax.

This is also true of us as we remember our own power in our lives. When fear is right on top of you, telling you that the life you want is never going to happen, that is when you can gain strength to carry on. That is when you recite your affirmations. That is when you notice your talismans. That is when you re-read a book that helped you in the past.

When I am feeling fear or doubt or worry, this is my affirmation:

I am a worthwhile, loveable, successful person because God created me in his perfect image.

Find your oath. Find your affirmation. Know it by heart. Let it help you defeat the fear in your life.



 

Segment Intending, prepaving your day

I have been trying to prepave or do segment intending for some time. I don't always do it the way I feel I should. According to The Law of Attraction by Abraham Hicks segment intending is making affirmations or intentions throughout your day. For example, getting ready for work is a segment. Leaving for work and driving is a segment. Getting to work is a segment. Answering a phone call & ending a phone call is a segment. Lunch is a segment. Leaving work is a segment. Getting started on dinner for your family is a segment. Going to bed is a segment.

Well, I don't have the time or energy or even the memory to segment each time. And I have yet to figure out how to segment a phone call when I don't know one is about to come in. But I have done segment intending
on a smaller scale and I always try to prepave my day. On days I forget, it seems more things go wrong. I start the prepaving the night before. I use this affirmation:

I intend to sleep well and rest well. I will wake on time, feeling refreshed. If I have any dreams, I will remember what I need to remember from those dreams when I wake. Thank you for a restful sleep.

In the morning while getting ready for work, usually in the shower, I will begin to segment my day. Sometimes I don't do this until I actually get to work, but I like to start early.

Affirmation:
I intend to have a good day. It will be steadily busy. I will have plenty of projects to complete. I will be surrounded by people with good attitudes. I intend that J (supervisor) will do her work and allow me to do my work. The day will pass quickly and I will feel a sense of accomplishment about the work I have done.

I have put the part in about my supervisor because she tends to like to hang over my shoulder. Since I've started saying this, many things have happened at work that has helped the day go smoother.

• My supervisor has started leaving the office to work in other areas of the building.
• I stood my ground regarding a process that I was in charge of. She wanted it done a certain way and I held out that my way was easier and more efficient. Upon discussion with another supervisor whose work overlapped this process, my way was chosen. I did segment intend for this particular meeting to go in my favor.
• I have been given more responsibilities.
• The day goes by quickly. Sometimes the day is over before I realize it.
• Whenever I finished my typical assigned duties, there is always another project waiting to be done. Sometimes this happens within minutes of finishing my typical work load.

On days I forget to prepave or segment intend, it seems the days go slower. No new projects come up and I am trying to find things to do to fill my work day. I feel more tired as the day goes on, constantly getting coffee or wanting to eat junk food instead of drinking my water and eating the lunch I brought from home.
You may not be able to prepave or segment intend every minute of your day, but you can do affirmations each night and morning.

If you know a big meeting is coming up, an affirmation for it. Remember
to detail what you want the outcome to be in that meeting and any other particulars. Do this at least a few days ahead if possible. Segment intending can make a big difference in your day.

Positive Thinking and Attitude for LOA success

In a lot of my research and reading about The Law of Attraction it seems that many people immediately latch on to things like what can I get? How much money can I receive? What material goods can I latch onto? Can I win the lottery? Can I win a contest? Can I hit it big in Vegas?

But I never really thought of any of those things. And it seems that now as I'm starting to live the wonderful, beautiful, abundant and creative life that I want the less material things I desire.I believe this is because I studied positive thinking before law of attraction.

I didn't start out to do this on purpose. Reading The Love Dare and drastically changed me. I didn't do it, consciously, from a desire to win my husband back. I wanted to do it because I wanted to obey God. I believe I was told to read the book and I did not. So that was my first step to obedience. And even without my husband at home during that time, I learned a lot about myself and my attitude. I did not like the person I was. So my first step was to confess to God and admit to myself that I was not the kind and generous person I believed myself to be. I accepted my responsibility in how my life had turned out and in doing so found a way to healing. I had to forgive myself and accept, in faith, that I am a person of value. Knowing that God loves me, God is with me and that he loves me unconditionally was a strong part of that process. Knowing that even today is still a big part of me, even after discovering information about the law of attraction. Having material things and wealth just doesn't matter - not without love.

1 Corinthians 13

¹ If I speak in the tongues^[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. ² If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. ³ If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,^[b] but do not have love, I gain nothing.  ⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
 ⁸ Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. ⁹ For we know in part and we prophesy in part, ¹⁰ but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. ¹¹ When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. ¹² For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
 ¹³ And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

(From Biblegateway.com)

Everything else is going to go away. But love will remain. No one is going to remember how much material things you had. But they will remember your kindness, your graciousness. They will remember what you did with your money. Were you a good steward of all you had been given?

But I would not even have this love, this feeling of peace, without starting my journey with The Love Dare and the positive thinking books I read. I knew that by healing my mind I could begin to heal my life. You cannot manifest change if it feels bad. And if you're coming from a place of greed or hate then you are going to continue manifesting those feelings.

That is why I believe many facets of the law of attraction have come easily. That is why my marriage has been able to heal. It's because all of this has been built on a foundation of positive change, positive love, and most important, faith. I had faith in God that He was there, he is here now, that he loved me and cared for me. Without that foundation I would not be who I am today.

I could have gone another path. I could have chosen to hate. I could have chosen to continue to be a victim. I could have sat at home crying and yelling and cursing my husband and the situation. I could have laid all the blame on him. But I didn't want to do that. I wanted to be a different person. I wanted to learn about myself. I didn't need to know why. I still don't. I just knew there were things to learn. And God is still teaching me those things today.

There are material things I want, things I desire. But more than riches, more than things, more than anything in the world, I want to live a wonderful, happy, abundant and creative life. And I want to live that life with people who are important to me. Thankfully, God has shown me how to do that by using the law of attraction and other universal laws that are in place. And I have been blessed.

It's all going to be okay.

It is very hard when people you love are going through hard things. It's hard when you are going through the same things but trying to stay positive. It's hard to look for what feels good when so much is unknown and it seems as if things are out of control.

But as I learn more about LOA and deliberate creation I know that there truly is nothing out of my control. Maybe things don't go as planned. Maybe a water pipe bursts. Maybe a car accident. Maybe an unexpected medical diagnosis. But all of these things are still within our control because WE can control our reactions to them.

Are we going to sit and fume and worry and get upset or are we going to do what we can, and doing all, be still?

When someone we love and care about, whether they are a family member or dear friend, keeps wanting to stay in that place where they sit and fume and worry then we have to care for ourselves. There's nothing wrong with that. Sometimes we need to step away and do what feels good before we end up in that same funky space.

This is where you let them stay in their funk and you CHOOSE to leave that vibration. Do what you can for them, but there has to come a time when you step away, just for a moment, and CHOOSE to find your feel
good.

You are not responsible for another person's health and happiness. It doesn't mean leaving for good. It doesn't mean a divorce or never speaking to someone again or ending a friendship. It just means respecting your space. Find your feel good, get back into our alignment and know that everything is going to be okay.
No matter what the issue is -- It's going to be okay.

Believe that.

Selling my first story

I have stated before that being a successful writer is my main purpose. That is how I ultimately want to make my living. I determined on this goal after reading Think and Grow Rich. When I read The Secret, however, I understood that I do not have to be tied to just one goal. Of course not. People want different things at different times. But for my livelihood and income, my goal is to be a successful writer.

After reading Connie Domino's Law of Attraction, I wrote an affirmation (or intention) for this year.

Thank you that I have earned $1,000 in writing income by August 31, 2012.

I started writing articles for Yahoo! Contributor Network (under my real name) and I'd written two stories under my pen name. One story did not sell. Two days after I wrote the other story, there was a call for submissions for a new anthology and I knew my new story would fit. This was in May. So I wrote the story at the end of April by inspiration. The first week of May I saw the call for submission for a theme that my story would fit into. See how Law of Attraction was kicking in even though I didn't really ask?

I did not hear back for months, so I was assuming it was a no. I decided to check my pen name's email one day and found an acceptance for my story - it was a week old. That email had actually been sent the day AFTER I wrote my affirmation in August. I just didn't check my email for almost two weeks.

I'm glad I checked it, because it was accepted if I could change the story somewhat. But she had to know soon. By the time I'd checked my email, I only had five days to respond.

I had no problem with changing the plot. The integrity of the story would be the same. I did the rewrite and sent it in the following day. Since then edits have been done and bios have been sent in. Contracts will be going out soon and the book should be published within the next two months.

Now this is not a big New York publisher. This is a small press that publishes erotic romance, which is what I primarily write under my pen name. The money is not great, but it's a step toward my goal of $1,000 this year and eventually $100,000 a year, with the amount increasing annually after that.

I believe this story sold other than the first one because it was inspired. I sat down to write and the words flew. I finished in less than three hours. In comparison, my first story was written due to seeing a call for submissions on a particular topic. While I still believe the story is good and I may do something with it myself later on, I felt that it was written too much like an assignment. Here's the topic, now turn something in. So my second story was much better to me because of the inspiration behind it. I wrote it just for the joy of writing.



I was recently inspired again the other day by a dream I had. I frequently have "story dreams". They're almost like watching a movie. So that is the inspiration for my next story. And I know that when it's ready there will be a desire for it as well. And so I will continue toward my goal of being a successful writer.

I have decided at this point that I will only write by inspiration. That doesn't mean I won't write daily on my work in progress. It means I won't write based on assignments. I won't write based on calls to submission. I will write what I am inspired to write and I will find a publisher who wants it or I will publish it myself. This feels right to me and I know that by doing this I will succeed.

LOA use with others - and an affirmation

I have heard some say that LOA can be used to control others. Not so. But you can influence others.

I am able to influence my son by keeping a level head and staying in a good mood. I mentioned before that we had a running joke about his smartass talking. I thought that by joking about it, it would end it. But it seemed to get worse. So now it doesn't matter if he's in a bad mood. I refuse to let it get to me. I refuse to argue, I refuse to play the "one up" game with him. I just stay calm. After all, I can only "control" me. Soon, though, after a little while to cool off, he will be okay. But I did stop calling attention to his smartass
remarks. That was giving them too much energy and it wasn't helping our relationship.

I did do this with my sweetie as well on something. I'll call it action X. It bothered me a lot and he could tell something was upsetting me, but I couldn't tell him what it was. So I asked God to intervene. Suddenly stuff started popping up all over relating to action X. When that happened, I knew I could let it go. Something was
happening. God was calling sweetie's attention to action X and I didn't have to. Within a week my sweetie had changed action X to something else and all was right again. But it was exciting to see LOA in action so quickly.

So now there is something else I am asking God for, asking him to use LOA to bring this to my sweetie's mind.

We have been planning to remarry in April of next year. But I would really like to do it now. I feel very good about this decision. We're taking two vacation days together in two weeks. I found out we can get married at the courthouse for $60 with no waiting period. So I am putting a request out there.

Thank you, God, for bringing us together again. You brought us through six months apart and you have kept your promises. Thank you for that. You know our hearts, you know how we feel about each other, and I am
ready. I want to get remarried now. I intend that sweetie will ask me to go to the courthouse and we will be remarried by October 24.

Backstory - Journey Begins

I've shared how I started out with discovering self forgiveness through the book The Love Dare. I also was reading my Bible. Psalms is where everyone needs to go when their world turns upside down. I was
praying constantly, journaling, looking for full time work. But little by little that despair began to dissipate.

It didn't go away overnight. No, there were still crying jags, there were still 3am phone calls to my mom. But as I started to think about how to rebuild my life there were times I knew something was happening. It all started with forgiving myself. Then I reached out to those I had hurt. I apologized where appropriate. I prayed for a lot of things.  Some things I probably shouldn't have prayed for, but when you are moving up and down the emotional scale from despair to anger you pray for some things out of anger. But I know that God knew my heart. And he continued to speak to me during this time.

This was also a time of turmoil for our teenage son. Every time I would see my ex husband or speak to him on the phone I would start crying. I was also dumping frustration, fear and anger on my son. So he told me in April that he was going to spend the summer with my family instead of staying with me. I can't say I blamed him. He needed the break from me and his dad. He left in April to stay with my family an hour and a half away.

During this time my ex and I were talking. The talks were sometimes good, sometimes bad. Even if not a fight, just spending time together was difficult. We had made plans to see certain movies together and it felt just wrong to see them apart. We had always done things as a family. And, yes, there was still a physical aspect to our relationship. But it hurt too much each time we saw each other. I know it hurt me a lot. It felt as though my heart were breaking every time we saw each other, every time I visited his apartment, every time we would do something and then go our separate ways. But every time I did that I believe I did get a little stronger. I was experiencing what LOA teachers call contrast. I was learning what I didn't want and it helped me clarify what I did want.

I did have to stop reading The Love Dare. It got to the point where it hurt too much to continue and I wasn't able to do all the exercises. But I did continue making amends where appropriate and I wanted to think more positively. I wanted to put my energy into something for me, something to help me continue to grow and change. I wanted to be a better person, not because I thought it would help me win back my husband, but because I knew I didn't want to be the woman I'd been for so many years.

I was feeling differently than I'd felt in the past. I had always said that if my husband left me, if we divorced, that I didn't believe I could make it. It would hurt too much. Well, it did hurt. But I was surviving. Not only surviving, but making it through. And if I could survive the loss of a 20 year marriage, what was there to be afraid of? So I continued my learning and growing, reading After the Locusts and Why You Do the Things You Do, sent to me by a friend who'd also gone through a divorce some years back.

Then I decided to finally read Think and Grow Rich. I'd had a copy of the ebook for a while as well as a hard copy of various essays written by Napoleon Hill and his partner, W. Clement Stone. It was also during this time that LOA entered my life, although I had no idea there was a name for it. Some call it the Universe or a Higher Power. But I knew it was God answering my prayers. I believe that this is how God works in my life, in all our lives. He works through the Law of Attraction.